The perils of googling homemade shampoo recipes

| by Lou | 11.05am UK time |

This is a public service announcement folks. If you run out of shampoo and think "I'll just whip up a homemade coconut shampoo recipe from the internet" - don't. I mean, I love natural homemade products from the internet - I use homemade laundry detergent*, I use homemade face masks**, I use homemade body scrubs*** - but boy oh boy was this one a mistake.

To set the scene: I haven't used chemically commercial shampoo in years. I tried the 'no-poo' thing, but living in an area with extremely hard water it just didn't work for me. So now I do buy shampoo, but it's the most natural I could find that would work for my long thick curly locks (Lush Curly Wurly coconut shampoo, should you be wondering), and I don't use any conditioner or styling products. I can comfortably go a week between washes and it never gets greasy or gross-looking.

However, I ran out of shampoo and there isn't a Lush near me. So first I used baking soda. It completely and utterly dried my hair out - much worse than back when I was using it in a transition to trying 'no-poo' - and I spent a few days with fly-away brittle hair until enough natural oils brushed through to help it out a little. Still hadn't got to a Lush, so come next time it needed washing I thought "I'll just google a homemade coconut shampoo recipe". I find one on a website called 'Style Craze' (I don't want to link to them in case anyone else feels curious enough to try) that I had the ingredients for - coconut milk, olive oil. It assured that this mix is enough to cleanse the scalp, and that hot water would wash it all out.

No no no no no no NO.

It didn't seem to be coming out so good, so I turned the hot water up to scalding and hoped for the best. But honestly - my hair felt like it was slicked in oil. My neck became covered in oil. I looked like I'd dunked my head in grease. My boyfriend came home and said "I hear the greasy hair look is very fashionable right now", then snickered to himself every time he looked at me. Eventually it was dry enough to plait it, pin it to my head, and tie it up with a scarf, before scrubbing my neck for the 5th time.

I managed to get to a shop that sold natural castile soap, so this morning I whipped up a different homemade shampoo that actually used soap this time, turned the shower up to scalding, and tried to wash it out. Nope. My hands were still coming away drenched in oil. Okay, just the castille soap by itself then. Nope. Alright, how about African black soap? Nope.

Okay fine. After years - YEARS - of my hair having been kept from harsh commercial chemically shampoos, I reached for my boyfriends cheap shampoo, squeezed out a handful, and lathered up. I turned the shower up as high as I could bear it, and scrubbed.

It seems okay - still a bit of an oily residue, but probably a little bit mad at me for exposing it to silicon and whatever-the-fuck-else is in that bottle. I've probably taken ten steps backwards on the well-trained weekly-wash ecosystem, but at least I don't look like I work over a fryer at the local fish 'n' chip shop. [Update at 3.40pm - my hair is now dry and still looks like someone poured a gallon of oil over it.]

I shall continue the quest for a homemade shampoo that actually cleanses and doesn't leave behind a gallon of oil, and will update if successful.

TL;DR - don't let the internet trick you into using coconut milk and olive oil on your hair.

*Homemade laundry detergent: 2 parts each of washing soda and borax, 1 part grated bar of natural soap, give it a couple of pulses in a food processor to get the soap granules as tiny as possible
**Homemade face mask: Full-fat greek yoghurt with a splash of vodka
***Homemade body scrub: 4 parts brown sugar, 1 part olive oil, a tiny dash of honey

Why Les Miserables (the film) is brilliant #2: The Sweep! The Scale!

| by Lou | 3.55pm UK time |

After a lifetime of being confined to the stage, it is wonderful to see Les Miserables come alive at such an epic sweeping scale.

This was particularly swoon-worthy in the first half hour, from the opening shot through to the ripped pieces of Valjean's past flying over the countryside of France.



I salute Tom Hooper for approaching it with such ambition... and perhaps even more so for resisting the urge to apply it to the whole story, particularly in paring back the battle to portray it as the minor (relative to history) skirmish that it was.

Oooh I'm just making myself want to go see it again...



 

Why Les Miserables (the film) is brilliant #1: Colm Wilkinson

| by Lou | 6.25pm UK time |


As a lifelong Les Miserables fan who fucking LOVES the new film, I'm taking the liberty of giving you my Top 5 reasons why it's fucking AWESOME.

Colm Wilkinson as The Priest

There is a special place in the heart of every Les Miserables fan for Colm Wilkinson, the original (and forever the best) Jean Valjean. One of the highlights of my life was being at the O2 for the 25th Anniversary concert when, after the main show was over, the original cast came out and Colm stepped forward to the microphone to deliver his ubiquitous line "God on high...", prompting a spontaneous mass eye-watering/geekgasm.

So when his face appeared on screen to sing "Come in Sir, for you are weary..." it felt like a very warm nod from the filmmakers to the Les Miserables geeks of this world.


(Of course, this also had its down-points, such as my utter inability to retain any sense of composure in the film's finale as Colm joins Hugh and Anne in giving the greatest of all final lines.)

Unemployment Part 3

| by Lou | 10.55am UK time |

Hi everyone! It's me! I'm back! And for the third time in three years, I'm an unemployed bum engaging in all the soul-searching and self-pitying that that entails.


For reasons I can't put into a public forum, I ended up with some money in my bank account after a (very personally unpleasant, but professionally successful) one-year stint at a major studio working as an Analyst. And I was like "This will be easy! I'll find a new job no trouble! It took two-and-a-bit months to find that job, but this time will be different!"

Nope.

Well, yes actually - it will be different...Because three months later I'm like WHAT THE FUCK.


I've gotten an interview for one role, for which I was told I had too much experience (I did, so that was fine, it was at the very beginning when I was just testing the water).

I've since had absolutely no response to any job applications, even those for which I am perfectly (and, I assume, reasonably uniquely) qualified.

Oh, except for one where the agent replied to say that the job was too junior for me. (I then directly submitted a CV to the company itself, making myself appear slightly younger and slightly less experienced, and got no interest from that either.)

Contrarily, anything more senior and I don't even get a phonecall, let alone an interview, let alone the job.

What the fuck is going on??!

I've read probably literally hundreds of job-hunting blogs/ advice columns/ tips/ motivators.

I've refined my CV over and over.

I've kept in touch with every agency in town that handles media and entertainment.

I've scoured every jobs board, every day, and signed up to every job alert email.

I've written custom cover letters and custom refined my CV for every application, always applying within a day or two of the job ad appearing.


And NOTHING.

Okay, so you're thinking: Well, there's a recession on. The job market is rammed with people, and lacking in jobs. In fact, people are in much worse positions.

But it's London! And I'm highly qualified, highly experienced, and looking at jobs of all levels... including ones at about where I was six years ago when I left New Zealand.

In fact, after six years of working my way up again from nothing, having already established a career in New Zealand, now is when I should be leveraging all that to land a great job that actually increases my salary for the first time since 2008, not desperately scrambling about for anything.

And I think what's really, really bothering me is that I genuinely think that a lot of the people I've worked with are incompetent, disinterested, and lazy. Yet their careers seem to have happened so easily for them. And additionally, it seemed to me like a lot of the people I worked with in a film studio didn't even particularly like films. So I'm like "how come they have a job, and I don't?" But the secret is that they all got in on permanent jobs, while I've been stuck with contract positions, which are of course the easiest and quickest to cut (and thanks to the Tories, getting ever easier to cut). 

So... any ideas? New careers I could try out that it's easy to move sideways into...?? Any magic positive thought manifestos out there to help keep someone like me motivated......???

Because I'm very quickly descending into sitting-on-the-sofa-watching-tv-for-the-rest-of-my-life mode.


30 to 30: Nemesis update

| by Bel |

Bel:

Do you remember how I have told you about how I have that nemesis, who I saw one time on the bus in [redacted] and he annoyed me how he was talking to the person sitting next to him and so now I hate him but I see him around town sometimes and I'm like GRRR THAT GUY even though I don't have any real reason to?

Marky:
Yes.

Bel:
THERE IS A PHOTO OF HIM IN THE PAPER TODAY WITH HIS NAME AND EVERYTHING

30 to 30: 9 days to go (apparently)


| by Bel | 

Bel: I'm looking forward to us all going out for dinner for my birthday. Have you got that Thursday night in your diary?

Bel's dad: Yes of course, next week.

Bel: Dad, no - not next week, in a fortnight!

Bel's dad: A fortnight?

Bel: Yes, on the 28th! Sheesh.

Bel's dad: Next week.

Bel: What?

Bel's dad: Tomorrow week in fact.

Bel: Tomorrow week??

Bel's dad: Yes, tomorrow is Thursday, all day until midnight, which means one week from then.

Bel: NEXT WEEK?!

Bel's dad: Yes.

Bel: My birthday is next week!!

Bel's dad: Yes. You'll be 30.

Bel: I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


30 to 30: Beginning of the end.

| by Bel |

Got my first birthday card in the mail this weekend.



Bluejay!! Outta the way!!


Technically the envelope was marked "FOR 29th JUNE" but I opened it right away anyway. Lou understands this of my nature and when she send me my lovely giftie early, I was given instruction to of course tear it open immediately.

And now I have this yummy visual reminder of all the rosebuds I'm going to drink at my birthday party!

30 to 30: My friend Lou in London

| by Bel | 

#94 on my epic To Do list was Visit Lou. I ticked this off at the end of last year, whilst also completing #1 Go On Our Honeymoon. That trip also crossed off #89 Spend New Year's Eve In An Exotic Location and #101 Visit Family In Sydney (Ranking in no way indicates importance, FYI!)

Here are some photos of us on our wonderful walking tour of inner city London, past the iconic sights on the Thames riverbank.



This is that bridge that gets pwned at the start of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince!!
And yes, our hair matches our outfits. 



When I saw this, I was like "Mark! You can barely even see the Globe in this photo!" and he was like "Um, yeah, I didn't actually know what you were talking about when you were like 'OMG! The Globe! Take my photo!!' so yeah."

The Shard!!!! (You have to say it like that - The Shard!!!)



Me using Lou's London A-Z to get around without supervision!

30 to 30: Kitteh luvs cupcakes

| by Bel | 


Katya made these delicious looking (and tasting!) rainbow decorated cupcakes this afternoon.



And then Bluejay decided she would share mine with me.

(Yes this is me with my uggs-wearing feet up in front of the fire)






You have not laughed at your cat being ridiculous until you have laughed at your cat being ridiculous with blue icing all over her whiskers.

30 to 30: 30 Songs

| by Bel |

Here is a playlist I made for Melissa, who is turning 30 today, exactly three weeks older than me!

Some of it is very specific to our friendship, but there should be resonance for anyone who listened to a lot of commercial radio in the late 90s.

  1. “Summertime” Dinah Washington band
  2. “Sweet Dreams” Eurythmics
  3. “Here Comes The Hotstepper” Ini Kamoze
  4. “Short Short Man" 20 Fingers, feat. Gillette
  5. “Informer” Snow
  6. “Would I Lie to You?” Charles & Eddie
  7. “Two Steps” Alice Russell
  8. "100 Days, 100 Nights" Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings
  9. “My Girl Josephine” Supercat
  10. “Kate” Ben Folds Five
  11. “My Sharona” The Knack
  12. "New Age Girl" Deadeye Dick
  13. “Prisoner of Society” The Living End
  14. “Everlong” Foo Fighters
  15. “Tonight Tonight” Smashing Pumpkins
  16. “Pepper” Butthole Surfers
  17. “Santa Monica” Everclear
  18. “What I Got” Sublime
  19. “She Wants To Move” NERD
  20. "Umi Says" Mos Def
  21. “Everything Is Everything” Lauryn Hill
  22. “I'll Be Missing You” Puff Daddy feat Faith Evans
  23. “I Swear” All 4 One
  24. “Head Over Feet” Alanis Morissette
  25. “Stay” Lisa Loeb
  26. “Building A Mystery” Sarah McLachlan
  27. “Father and Son” Cat Stevens
  28. “Everybody Hurts” REM
  29. “Street Spirit” Radiohead
  30. “Exit Music For A Film” Brad Mehldau

30 to 30: In which I go to the gym so you don't have to.

| by Bel | 



  • Women only gyms are different to co-ed gyms. The atmosphere is less competitive and there's a wider variety of body shapes.
  • Don't drink water before the end-of-session ab tracks in your aerobics class. No matter how thirsty you are, hold out. Don't dooooo it!! Having a big swig of water and then launching into crunches will make you want to vomit.
  • The first class of spin is cruel on your crotch, but you soon get used to it (/destroy sensitivity in that area?).
  • Treat the free shit like you paid for it. Because really you did. Any of those "free" personal training sessions they give you when you pay the joining fee, make sure you book 'em in. If they have a sauna or massage bed, get stuck into it.
  • No one cares what gym gear you're wearing.
  • But maybe it will make a difference to you? Wearing a matchy-matchy ensemble where my shoes are coordinated with my leggings and singlet makes me feel like I am part of a TEAM! Here to WORK IT! To go for GOLD!
  • (I am assuming that you are wearing a supportive bra and comfy shoes. Which of course you are.)
  • When you bump into your boss half naked in the changing rooms, just maintain eye contact. In the eyes.
  • When the instructor enthusiastically yells "Sing along, you guys!", no one will sing along.

30 to 30: Stitchin'

| by Bel |

Day Zero Project #22: Complete a cross stitch project

Ok, technically what I did was embroidery, not cross stitch. But still counts!

I had a look in the new craft store Made Marion for a pattern that would be suitable for my toddler godson. The people in that shop are lovely, but sadly the range was limited to pretty traditional teddybears. I did get a nice big hoop though - and resisted the urge to stock up on more lovely colours of thread!

Glory be to Google - searching found me exactly what I was after! I bought a PDF pattern from Auckland-based crafter The Stitchsmith. Take a look at the original and you'll see that I adapted it quite a bit for my finished product. In fact, I noticed that there were some differences in the pattern and the completed example - there is more room to be creative in this kind of embroidery than a by-the-numbers cross stitch.

I also resisted buying up on carbon paper and transfer pens. I figure I'd just trace the design onto the fabric.

Idyllic domestic scene? DON'T BE FOOLED.




Sellotaping the pattern up onto the window, I grabbed my pillowcase and started to attempt to trace the pattern on.

First, it was awkward getting the bit of the pillowcase I wanted to stitch onto, to overlay nicely onto the window. I needed a third arm to hold it in place. Then the two arms I do have started getting tired. The sun was conveniently shining through and illuminating the paper for my tracing - but also shining right in my eyes and making it hard to see.

After about the sixth time of losing my grip on the material and tracing completely askew, I gave up and tore the pattern down off the glass. I stormed off to make myself a cup of tea, because I am boss like that.

When my inept crafter's rage had worn off slightly, I took another look at how I'd gotten along. It was then that I realised I had made an idiot mistake. Not wanting to stain the white material, I was using my trickmarker, which is designed to fade and leave no trace. DESIGNED TO FADE, PEOPLE. Sheesh, what a muppet.

Invisible chopper. Sigh.



Even after just 15 minutes, my tracing was already beginning to pale and disappear. Unless I was intending to magically upskill and sew like crazy for the next half hour undisturbed, I was going to be left stitching aimlessly in the wilderness.

I resorted to sellotaping the pattern to a hard cover book, sliding that inside the pillowcase and tracing (lightly, but not TOO lightly) with a soft pencil.

This went much better.

Especially after Mark saw me faffing around with it, sighed and harummpfed and then, once I relinquished my attempts, joyously took over the sketching.

(I had no problem handing it over. My mum is a very talented artist, who couldn't resist intervening and giving tips whenever she saw us muddling our way through art projects as kids. The frustration of not being able to make something look on the paper the way you have it in your head is soon dissipated if you're willing to swallow your pride and let someone who knows what they're doing take over. And besides, otherwise you'll have to put up with them hovering nearby and 'not saying' anything, which is worst of all.)

I don't have any "work in progress" photos to share with you - and even more sadly, no photos of the backside of the stitching. But let me tell you, it was exquisite. I used to be mortified of anyone sneaking a look at the back of my work and seeing the unholy spaghetti tangle mess revealed there. Not this time! All my stitches looked as neat and tidy as they did on the front, and I carefully tied and snipped off small knots. Honest!

The bulk of the sewing was done while keeping DK company in hospice. I found it incredibly useful to have something to do, which wasn't intrusive or consumed too much of my attention. It was the perfect level of distraction, while still being able to stay engaged with what was happening around me. I feel a bit rude reading a book (but not a magazine, funnily enough) and it was unbearable to just sit there doing nothing except watching and waiting.

The rest was done sitting on the couch at home, half-watching movies in the evening. It's amazing what you can tolerate when you're focusing elsewhere. COUGH Fast and the Furious for the nine millionth time COUGH.

I ditched the hanging banner from the original pattern and made the 'copter pilot a bit more cartoony. I drew freehand a couple of cutesy clouds to give a bit of aerial context and am so pleased with how they turned out.






 




I've since gotten a book out from the library, as I realised from reading the pattern instructions that my repertoire of stitches is fairly limited. What you can see here is mostly backstitch and I split my embroidery cotton to 3 ply.  The main exception is some simple stitch on the rotor blades which I did with the full 6 ply.  The detail in the line across the chopper is a metallic gold thread - it's a bitch to get through the needle but looks fantastic.



The courier should be delivering this giftie today - I hope Leo enjoys it! I am looking forward to getting stuck into a new project... any requests??

30 to 30: Consolation prize

| by Bel | 

Lovely long weekend here and since I missed three days, here are three outfits and three nails to satisfice. (AND A PHOTO OF MY CAT.)

Outfit for SlutWalk protest:
Faux fur coat - Collectif (early birthday gift from the wonderfulest Lou!!)
Merino cardigan - Minnie Cooper
Chucks with red glitter laces 
Catseye sunglasses - you can get similar ones off TradeMe




Outfit for rainy days:
Raincoat - Farmers. It folds up into its own pocket!
Hoodie - AS Colour
Catseye glasses - free online with a voucher

Outfit for being fance:
Dress - Jacqui E. I feel so Mad Men wearing it!
Wedges - Hush Puppies


Necklace - Agatha Paris (YES I BOUGHT IT IN PARIS. But apparently there is a boutique in Auckland?)
And I did my hair with hot rollers.



Butter London 'West End Wonderland'.
Bought in a sale online, I can't bring myself to spend the $35 in Farmers.

Me: OPI Nicki Minaj collection 'Pink Friday'
Brookie: Australis 'Sweet Pea' base with
OPI Nicki Minaj collection 'Fly' french tips.

OPI Nicki Minaj collection 'Did It On 'Em' base with Orly 'It's Up To Blue' french tips

Nails being put to good use, tickling Bluejay under her chin.

30 to 30: 100% photos of my cat. Because Friday.

| by Bel | 


Bluejay. And me!


(She lets you know she wants breakfast by sitting on your throat. SO CUTE.)



 

 

 
 
(this is her lapping water from the bottom of the shower, which is apparently something she loves to do)

(And this is her scratching the shit out of new armchairs which had been in our home approx 2 mins)

Oh and one video for good measure. This is her showing a piece of paper WHO IS BOSS.